Okay, I'll take the hit, many of my loyal readers think the above headline signifies another of my famous satires about some poor slob, caught up in a story and they didn't know how to get out of the situation.....trust me, this story could not be further from any such situation. This story involves warm blooded animals, on the prowl, acting out in an instinctive protection mode against man.
With ribs aching and the imprint of hoof-marks on her forehead, Caren della Cioppa miraculously lived to tell the story of a recent attack by a mother moose cow on her property in Palmer, Alaska. It happened on a bright brisk morning, "is there any other kind in Alaska," when Cioppa, who was clearing underbrush to clear a pathway, heard a sound behind her, and as she stood, she was completely bowled over by a mother moose. "Holy Sarah Palin."
Scrambling to her feet, Caren della Cioppa was again charged and knocked to the ground, where the moose proceeded to stomp the 65 year old part time weather watcher, leaving her near unconscious, and spread eagle on the wet ground. The women rolled over, groping for her cell phone to call for help when she saw the mother moose gallop off into the woods.
The attack, not uncommon during the height of the moose birthing season, is an especially dangerous time for anyone silly enough to venture to close to a mother moose. The mothers are aggressively protective during about a 2 week period in May, when most of their births occur.
Moose attacks in the Anchorage area occur several hundred times during the early spring, as the birthing season "heats up." One such moose attacked a girl on a bicycle, knocking her to the ground, another attacked a 6 year old boy, knocking him unconscious. One man, in 1995, was stomped to death on the campus of the University of Alaska at Anchorage.
As one state wildlife biologist put it, "although moose are not predators, and charge only when they feel threatened, or their personal space space is trespassed," moose should be respected at all times. If you see a moose on a trail, or in an open field, view them like they have a "loaded gun," and give then a wide birth. You mean to tell me that Alaskanites will now have to worry about invading an animals space, "shut the front door," the final reason why I will never visit Alaska.
To show you exactly how crazy Palin country is, della Cioppa, the women who was attacked, well, she would like to see, and pet the two babies that the mother moose was protecting. "I wonder what baby moose are called, "Mooselets, or baby meese," oh well, another unanswered question.
BULLS EYE TO BUCKEYES, (Columbus Dispatch)
You know the story, Ohio State University football players selling memorabilia that was given to them, selling university issued practice and game equipment and taking tattoos for free, "ugh, that one still gets me." The 5 accused players will sit out the first 5 games of the 2011 season and their coach, implicit in the activity, failing to tell N.C.A.A. investigators of that fact, will also sit the first 5 games of the season.
Now comes the bombshell that I knew would come, Ray Small, a former Buckeye turned suspended player, failed tryout candidate for several N.F.L. teams, now probably working at a McDonald's someplace in Ohio, has come foreword with his story on the matter and if true, could put the old scarlet and gray of the Buckeyes in real trouble for the coming season.
Ray Small was a highly recruited wide receiver/kick returner who played his high school football at Glenville high school in Glenville, Ohio. Small by 2009, was entering his senior season as a Buckeye, and seemed to have worked through several brushes with the O.S.U. coaching staff, and seemed poised for a banner senior season.
Missing classes, late for practice and team meetings were all a part of Small's problems with the coaching staff and of course the old bug-a-boo, "a poor attitude" came into play during his senior season. Small's father, Ken, did not help the situation when the elder Small accused the coaching staff of "having it in for his son."
The final straw, at least for Small, was a suspension that came in November of 2009, effectively ending Small's time as a member of the Ohio State University football team. Then came attempted tryouts with National Football League teams during the summer of 2010, and a failure to land a spot on any N.F.L. team.
Now Ohio State finds Small, again causing trouble for it's football program with his revelations that "everybody was doing it." What was "everybody" doing, well according to Ray Small, "everybody was selling memorabilia for cash," and he had received cash and special deals on cars when he was playing for the Buckeyes.
These revelations, if true, means that the scandal involving the Buckeyes goes a hell-of-alot deeper then first thought. Again, according to Small, football players don't even think about NCAA rules. Although Ohio State has a large and proactive compliance department, student-athlete, at least football student athletes have little or no concerns.
"There is so much love for the players out there," and there's so much money for the taking, "I don't see what the big deal is," Small said. Currently Ohio State is investigating 50 automobile transactions between it's athletes, their families and 2 Columbus area auto dealers.
The thing that struck me was the caviler attitude that Small has with regards to what is legal and illegal, what is ethical and an active member of the football team, the basketball team, the baseball team, or the pocket pool team, an education should be the top priority.
Like I said a little more then a month ago, "only time will tell," we here at Chronicle headquarters will keep watching for any future breaking news.
SUPER SERVICE, (Marquette Mining Journal)
I guess I'm going to have to take a road trip up to Marquette, Michigan in the near future, I just read about a gas station that offers full island gas service, like back in the old days. For those of you loyal readers that don't remember, when you stopped at a gas station 40 or so years ago, you sat in your car, lit a cigarette, looked regal and waited for the man to wait on you, kinda like a restaurant, except you didn't get a menu to chose from.
Once in a great, great while, you can still find that kind of service, like a Freedom gas station located at 501 Washington Street on the west side of Marquette. I remember the day, "not like yesterday," but I do remember when a guy would come out, get you your gas, clean your windshield, check your oil and then take your money, "for the gas." Not like now, where they just take your money for little or no gasoline, "it seems."
Hell I even worked as what they used to call a "gas jockey." You'd greet everybody with a smile, get their gas, wash the windows, check the oil and then collect the money. The pay was crap, but there were fringe benefits, especially in a tourist town where I was brought up. The fringe benefits, "if you were lucky," an ample view of a nice leg, or an opened blouse view of some bosoms. Believe it or not, for a single white kid, just getting started in life, the benefits made the job.
I can remember during the final stages of my mothers driving adventures, "near the end of her driving career, every time she got behind the wheel was an adventure," she wouldn't stop unless there was a full service gas station. She died 10 years ago at the age of 89 and she'd quite driving about 10 years earlier, so full service was getting pretty thine, but still, she never pumped an ounce of gas in her life. She never said it, but I know she felt pumping her own gas was undignified and below her position in life.
Now were down to getting tail-piped at gas pumps, feel ripped off and grumble every time we have to stop. But in the earlier times, when it was slower and people seemed to have time to talk, it was a pleasure to "fill up" at the gas station and talk to the "gas attendant."
You know the story, Ohio State University football players selling memorabilia that was given to them, selling university issued practice and game equipment and taking tattoos for free, "ugh, that one still gets me." The 5 accused players will sit out the first 5 games of the 2011 season and their coach, implicit in the activity, failing to tell N.C.A.A. investigators of that fact, will also sit the first 5 games of the season.
Now comes the bombshell that I knew would come, Ray Small, a former Buckeye turned suspended player, failed tryout candidate for several N.F.L. teams, now probably working at a McDonald's someplace in Ohio, has come foreword with his story on the matter and if true, could put the old scarlet and gray of the Buckeyes in real trouble for the coming season.
Ray Small was a highly recruited wide receiver/kick returner who played his high school football at Glenville high school in Glenville, Ohio. Small by 2009, was entering his senior season as a Buckeye, and seemed to have worked through several brushes with the O.S.U. coaching staff, and seemed poised for a banner senior season.
Missing classes, late for practice and team meetings were all a part of Small's problems with the coaching staff and of course the old bug-a-boo, "a poor attitude" came into play during his senior season. Small's father, Ken, did not help the situation when the elder Small accused the coaching staff of "having it in for his son."
The final straw, at least for Small, was a suspension that came in November of 2009, effectively ending Small's time as a member of the Ohio State University football team. Then came attempted tryouts with National Football League teams during the summer of 2010, and a failure to land a spot on any N.F.L. team.
Now Ohio State finds Small, again causing trouble for it's football program with his revelations that "everybody was doing it." What was "everybody" doing, well according to Ray Small, "everybody was selling memorabilia for cash," and he had received cash and special deals on cars when he was playing for the Buckeyes.
These revelations, if true, means that the scandal involving the Buckeyes goes a hell-of-alot deeper then first thought. Again, according to Small, football players don't even think about NCAA rules. Although Ohio State has a large and proactive compliance department, student-athlete, at least football student athletes have little or no concerns.
"There is so much love for the players out there," and there's so much money for the taking, "I don't see what the big deal is," Small said. Currently Ohio State is investigating 50 automobile transactions between it's athletes, their families and 2 Columbus area auto dealers.
The thing that struck me was the caviler attitude that Small has with regards to what is legal and illegal, what is ethical and an active member of the football team, the basketball team, the baseball team, or the pocket pool team, an education should be the top priority.
Like I said a little more then a month ago, "only time will tell," we here at Chronicle headquarters will keep watching for any future breaking news.
SUPER SERVICE, (Marquette Mining Journal)
I guess I'm going to have to take a road trip up to Marquette, Michigan in the near future, I just read about a gas station that offers full island gas service, like back in the old days. For those of you loyal readers that don't remember, when you stopped at a gas station 40 or so years ago, you sat in your car, lit a cigarette, looked regal and waited for the man to wait on you, kinda like a restaurant, except you didn't get a menu to chose from.
Once in a great, great while, you can still find that kind of service, like a Freedom gas station located at 501 Washington Street on the west side of Marquette. I remember the day, "not like yesterday," but I do remember when a guy would come out, get you your gas, clean your windshield, check your oil and then take your money, "for the gas." Not like now, where they just take your money for little or no gasoline, "it seems."
Hell I even worked as what they used to call a "gas jockey." You'd greet everybody with a smile, get their gas, wash the windows, check the oil and then collect the money. The pay was crap, but there were fringe benefits, especially in a tourist town where I was brought up. The fringe benefits, "if you were lucky," an ample view of a nice leg, or an opened blouse view of some bosoms. Believe it or not, for a single white kid, just getting started in life, the benefits made the job.
I can remember during the final stages of my mothers driving adventures, "near the end of her driving career, every time she got behind the wheel was an adventure," she wouldn't stop unless there was a full service gas station. She died 10 years ago at the age of 89 and she'd quite driving about 10 years earlier, so full service was getting pretty thine, but still, she never pumped an ounce of gas in her life. She never said it, but I know she felt pumping her own gas was undignified and below her position in life.
Now were down to getting tail-piped at gas pumps, feel ripped off and grumble every time we have to stop. But in the earlier times, when it was slower and people seemed to have time to talk, it was a pleasure to "fill up" at the gas station and talk to the "gas attendant."
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